Making Friends in the online Social Networks

If you can remember the first time you signed up for Facebook and you had no friends or very few. You hear all these strategies for utilizing these platforms but with few friends to start with, its kind of hard to be taken seriously.

I am often asked where to start?

Social marketing is all about getting the most out of social networks. Here are some important friending techniques to be aware of:

Step 1 - Creating your networks

First of all, create your presence on different social networks like facebook, MySpace and Linkedin. Set up your accounts and customize your pages.

Step 2- Adding people to your network

Once you have your pages all set up, you need to get people onto your network. First of all make sure you can distinctly define what kind of people you would want to add as friends. These will be people who can benefit your business in any way. People who are part of your market segments, people who are domain experts, people who can benefit you through synergies, people who are influential in the industry, people who look up to you as an expert.. etc

There are different levels of potential friends on social networks: First of all, add all of those people that you know directly. If you know someone, then approach them in an a way you would to a real human being and not a robot. That is, introduce yourself.

I get friends requests all the time from spammers who use automated software for friending or cut and paste the same message to hundreds of people they find in other people’s friend networks. Be realistic - thats no way to befriend people. Be warned that if you do this you can be locked out of the platform for spamming, your IP address can be blocked from ever accessing the domain again. Recipients can click a link in each request that says, “report as spam”. A few of these reports against your name and you’re out of the game.

So when finding old acquaintances out of the blue, approach them like you would if you had seen them in a crowded bar. I’m assuming that if you come across them after a long while; you would walk over, re-introduce yourself and engage them in brief conversation after which you would initiate a desire to share contact details to remain in contact.

Its no different in these online networks, except that the crowded bar extends across the globe and its open 24/7 and you don’t need to exchange contact details. You simply send a friend request.

Next, you can introduce yourself to the friends of your friends by letting them know who you know in common. It’s not recommended to say “hi, I am a friend of John Smiths do you want to be friends on Facebook” - although a lot of folks do adopt this tactic.

I prefer to look at the persons profile to find something in common. I then introduce myself on the basis of our common friend and try to reference the topic that person seems interested in. Its an idea to be positive and complimentary where you can and end your comment with a question so it’s easy for the recipient to reply. If done right you can come back at their reply and before you know it you’re no longer strangers - so at a convenient time you can ask them if they would like to hook up as friends.

Thirdly you can search for groups in whatever niche you’re into and invite the people in these groups to become friends. Its recommended to join the group first and always contribute to the conversations in the group in an intelligent way before attempting to friend its members.

Expand your network as much as you possibly can.

Follow and be followed:

Find people that you want to have on your lists and follow them on twitter and other social network sites. Later, send them invites - a good percentage of them will accept. Social networking is all about following and being followed. Its about giving first and then expecting something in return. The more you follow and the more you contribute towards adding value to the more you will be followed in return.

The rule of thumb is the more value you bring to other people’s daily lives by what you do and say; the more people will follow you. Its no different to life offline, really except its far less forgiving than real life.

Web2.0 platforms take life as it has always been and makes it possible to maintain relationships with far more people that the offline world ever could. It takes away the factors of space, distances, traveling and communication logistics - and viola, there is no limit to the number of people you can befriend online. Um, yes, you will need high-speed internet though. This changes the social dynamics somewhat, which I will go into in another post but the thing you need to be careful about is that in the online world everything is recorded.

Everything you do leaves a footprint so there is less room for error. Offline if you say something you regret to someone, the damage can be limited to those who hear you say it first hand, those that hear what you said second hand and to a lesser extent those who hear it third hand.

Make the same mistake online and what you did or said can haunt you for life, so be careful.

A good writeup from the blogging world around us…

What Social Networking Can Do For You - Social networking is literally the way of the future.

Simon U Ford (SUF.EDBD)

Today’s tip! The first step to being super organized is to manage all of your passwords in you’re browser. Being able to share them across your team is a bonus.

Social Traffic - Event Marketing In A New Media Scape Join my JV partner program

Digg - Making Friends in the online Social Networks Twitter - Making Friends in the online Social Networks Stumble Apon - Making Friends in the online Social Networks Del.icio.us - Making Friends in the online Social Networks Facebook - Making Friends in the online Social Networks Myspace - Making Friends in the online Social Networks Google - Making Friends in the online Social Networks Technorati - Making Friends in the online Social Networks Share This - Making Friends in the online Social Networks Reddit - Making Friends in the online Social Networks

Related Posts


If you enjoyed this post, please consider leaving a comment or subscribe to the feed and get future articles delivered to your feed reader.

  • Love this concept of the "bar." You need to approach every relationship as beginning a conversation with real human beings. Not shouting or automating a robotic form of communication. I also segment Twitter and FB friends. Twitter is more open and FB is a place of people I really know and have engaged in conversations with.
  • Social Media is as you say just like going to party,or a relatives wedding where you meet new people but also run into all those familiar faces ..10years later .. you know them ,, as they were... not as they are now and you have probably changed a bit yourself. Superficially you hug like long lost friends but then you need to update whats been going on in your life and ASK about theirs... listen to what makes them tick ..Now. So many people just see a familiar face from school on facebook and push "friend request".... then wonder why there is no reply...?
  • I really like this post. It is a great introduction to how to get started with the social networks. I remember being very hesitant to add any "friends". These are contacts that really don't feel like friends. I am now more familiar with the concept and more comfortable asking people to join my page or my network.

    The other important learning you should take away from this article is the fact that social networking is a long term process. It is not an overnight success. You have to build your network and your relationships, just like you would offline. The obvious advantage of the social media is that you can actually establish relationships and communicate with others. This is bringing the online world to live and that is a good thing.
  • bobbicknell
    Great key points Simon "Social networking is all about following and being followed. Its about giving first" "Giving value to people first."

    Enjoyed the dos and don't s of networking tips that you shared on this post. It does come back to building relationships and treating people the way you want to be treated. Thanks again for insights Simon and i recommend to others to get your book "Social Traffic"!
  • My whole thought process has changed in the last few months. I didn't really believe that you could form true friendships over the internet. I was wrong! Now I'm chatting with people around the world. A small quality group of friends are much better than having thousands who know nothing about you. If you give respect it will come back to you.
    It's remarkable that everything you put on the internet is there forever. Makes me think twice before I hit "post".
  • I agree with most of the points and the most important I think is what Google's CEO in Brazil, Alex Dias, said: care not be a vexation in social media network. And he and more people are saying that there's not a virtual friend, customer, they are more real than in real life.
  • To me this is just common sense. I never understood the mentality of adding all the "friends" you can. Conversations and building on relationships is the key. I also feel that like minds are attracted. I keep my own profile open to the public, and also find many friends, both new and old in topic groups that interest me.
  • I have seen social networks rip people apart for actions or videos its a reality. I believe attraction marketing is at place with Social Networking. Respect and common ground especially the later you point out as adding value to meeting that person. I started asking more questions, the brilliant result was I was getting more messages back, starting conversations and not just having it stop. The trend I see is people just adding people randomly, this does not add value how do you know what that persons interests are. I see the game getting raised, the value increasing and this will be the only norm for times to come.
  • This could be titled Social Media Etiquette by Simon U Ford
  • I have to add something to the mix which you touched on just a bit Simon.

    Never, Ever under ANY circumstances send a blank friend request. The same way you walk up to a person and introduce yourself offline is the way you should do it online.

    Could you imagine someone just walking up to you and saying "Friend Request," you'd probably think they were mentally challenged, rude, or just plain dumb.

    Obviously this is a major faux pas which devalues you as a "friend."

    Keep it in mind the next time you send a friend request, it only takes one minute to introduce yourself.
  • This makes me want to go and delete or collect many of the people I accepted as friends in Facebook, but I'm waiting to see if you talk about ways to work with these people in your Facebook training. (I've been befriended by a group of young international jewelers who are busy networking, and I've become a link to some of them ... my fantasy is to give them to an arts group where they can all interact with their like minds.)
blog comments powered by Disqus